By Tobi Schwartz-Cassell
Short answer: It depends.
When it comes to sex, Sociologist Eve Stern says, “New research shows women may be more likely to be the culprits of infidelity than men.” In her article, “The Science of Infidelity: Why Women are More Likely to Cheat on Men,” she explains, “The key word is vasopressin. Women who carry a type of genetic mutation in the receptor for this hormone are more likely to engage in infidelity…”
In the meantime, another hormone, oxytocin, “is like the mitochondria of our feelings…It’s a hormone that also acts as a neurotransmitter in the brain and essentially increases our drive to romantically pair up.”
Interesting. That article is chock full of other scientists who agree with Stern’s findings, so maybe we can infer that more women are more secretive about their sex lives than men. But it’s not just in the realm of intimacy!
Author Kathryn Eisman in Men’s Health magazine also takes the stance that women are more secretive than men. In her article “30 secrets Every Woman Keeps from her Man,” Eisman says, “Her best friend knows everything. She knows all of your vitals—from the size of your bank account to the size of your other, um, holdings. When her friend smirks at you knowingly, you are not imagining it. She knows. So just know that she knows, and deal with it. (It’s not going to change.)”
But are women more secretive in every aspect of life? No, according to Tony Mecia in “Financial Infidelity poll: 6% hid bank account from spouse or partner.” It’s the men who are more likely to be secretive. “Men are more likely than women to have secret credit cards or bank accounts and to spend big money without telling their partners.” Mecia’s info comes from a recent survey conducted by Creditcards.com. He continues, “Eight percent of men admitted to having had secret accounts, compared with 5 percent of women. Men were almost twice as likely as women to say they spent $500 or more without telling their partners: 26 percent of men, versus just 14 percent of women.”
So what do you think? Who’s more secretive…men or women? Are you willing to share? If so, please comment below.
♥
PS: As many of you know, I’ve started to work out at Cherry Hill Health and Racquet Club to strengthen my core and other areas. One of the main reasons I need to do this is because of osteoporosis in my spine. I’ll be providing updates of my progress as I go along. In the meantime, come work out with me! Sign up for a free 10-day pass!
More importanty who keeps a secret first. The woman or man.
Secretive – men may have secret credit for other than infidelity. Maybe surprise wife with jewelry gift! (We wish!!!), or to avoid arguments over costly luxury items like golf clubs. Also, there are business credit cards that are billed to the office address. I had one for business travel and although it wasn’t secret, I doubt my husband knew about details because bills went to office.
Above is true also of women – surprise gift for spouse, indulgent gift for relative or child, the expensive gown for the office party, not wanting to argue over discretionary purchases. And a big one – Independence!
BBG
All excellent points, Betty. But I’ve always been able to maintain independence and still be above board with my hubby. I do agree entirely about the secret stash to buy him something lavish, though. I’ve done that myself. 🙂 Thank you so much for sharing! I hope you comment again soon! I really enjoyed your counterpoint.